Relationship Check-In Cards

How to use it

1. Choose together which topics are open for discussion today.
2. Take turns selecting a card, responding, passing, or asking to pause.
3. Listen without requiring agreement, repair, reassurance, or personal disclosure.
4. Stop and seek appropriate support if the conversation feels unsafe or pressured.

Reflection prompts

• Which topic felt useful, unfinished, or better left for another time?
• What helped each person have choice during the check-in?
• What support or boundary would help after this conversation?

Facilitator guidance

Screen for coercive control, intimidation, retaliation risk, and other safety concerns before shared use. These cards are not appropriate for unsupervised couple dialogue when speaking honestly or passing may carry risk; individual or specialist support may be safer.

Adaptations & accessibility

• Use one preselected low-intensity card with a time limit and separate pass cards.
• Offer written, AAC, translated, or individual-response formats without requiring responses to be shared.
• Separate the deck into logistics, connection, stress, hopes, and repair so participants can exclude topics.

Review considerations

Enhanced couples-therapy, coercive-control, and second licensed-clinician review required before use.